The Joshua Yoder Blog

Here is one of these come to Jesus moments in my life. One of the things that I have been dealing with but yet to really confront is my relationship with my parents. It has been mentioned several times in my blogs that myself and my twin brother Chad were born with Cerebral Palsy and Scoliosis. Unfortunately, the issues that we face everyday has caused a lot of issues and frustrations between us and our parents. I love my parents, I really do and I know they love us. But at the same time, we are not as close as I wish we could be. For a long time, Chad and I struggled with a lot of things and we weren't exactly sure why we were and we both have been dealing with a lot of depression. By the time we are getting ready to leave high school was when we really discovered a lot of things and since then we have been trying to figure out a lot about ourselves and try to adjust to an ever changing world. To be honest, these changes have been happening really fast, maybe too fast for us. And

 With it being the Halloween season and everything that is happening this month is all about horror movies and stories, I thought it be cool to talk about one of my personal favorite themes in gothic storytelling is the creatures of the night, Vampires. Vampires has always been an interesting concept to me when it comes to goth literature for most of my life. There have been so many different variations as to how the term of vampires came to be. Heck! There were plenty of different stories and tales about vampires that were before what I originally thought to be honest with you guys. I thought the lore of the vampire was started back during Medieval times in Europe. But during my research, I've discovered that stories of such creatures were told in days long before that and also were considered to be used as another name for demons. For an example, Lilith has been named a demon that drinks blood and even in religions like Hinduism and Greek-Roman. In fact, there have been legends o

 Who doesn't love a good scary movie? And what better time of the year to do so than whole month of October for the Halloween season! Now most of the people I know pretty much turn their heads and laugh or always ask me how can you watch this stuff? The answer is very simple, I love the mysticism of them, the lore, the wonder what could be out there in the night. It is a very scary thought, don't get me wrong.  Another reason is my own curiosity of the unknown, there is so much stuff out there in this world that we do not know nor understand. Let alone in the entire Universe. In my humble opinion, some of the best storytelling in any form of literature have come from the horror/gothic genre. I say this because these stories showcase what we humans are capable of doing to one another as well as to ourselves when it comes to having great power.  And I also believe in the Supernatural and that there is somethings happening all around us and we just don't see with our own eyes.

 With it being the Halloween season coming ever so closer to us. We are all probably getting our pumpkins and getting ready to carve some faces on them. But has anyone ever heard of the folk tales of how the carving of the pumpkins came to be? Well there are a few different versions of the tale and it is also similar to the story of Will-o-the-wisp. One story is from Ireland back in the 18th century where Stingy Jack a lazy but shrewd blacksmith tricked the Devil into climbing an apple tree and once up there, Jack placed  or carved a cross on the trunk of the tree so the Devil could not get down. Another one was that Jack was being chased by people whom he had robbed. Jack runs into the Devil who tells him that it is time for him to die. However, Jack managed to convince the Devil to turn into a coin to be used against the Christian villagers. As the Devil went inside his wallet, there was also a cross inside of the wallet and it trapped the Devil inside. Both stories also talked about

 One of my personal favorite holidays I always enjoy throughout my life has been the spookiest time of the year, Halloween. To be honest with all of you, I can say that I enjoy the whole month of October lol. Throughout this entire month is nothing but horror movies like Friday the 13th, Halloween, Nightmare on Elm Street and of course the classics like Dracula, Frankenstein, The Wolfman, Hocus Pocus, Casper, etc. Another fun activity that we all get to do around this entire month is heading out and finding some costumes to wear for treat or treating whether it be for yourself or getting to take the kids out and getting candy. I know that was my favorite part growing up as kid. But the biggest reason why I love Halloween is the simple fact that it is the one time of the year where I can honestly feel like I can be myself. I never felt "normal" my whole life and never really fit in with anyone and every time October came around I kind of feel like I can be normal for once. If

 Well today is Friday the 13th and it means that we are all getting closer to one of my favorite holidays in Halloween. Now most people usually associate Friday the 13th with the horror franchise that has graced our theaters since 1980s as Jason Voorhees brought terror many victims who come across Camp Crystal Lake. Although a great movie series, but it is not the only thing that involves the the legend. In fact several different religions all at some point have beliefs of Friday the 13th. And they all believe that it is bad luck. Such things like Norse tells the story of of 12 gods were having a dinner party in Valhalla when the trickster god Loki appeared uninvited and had Hoor shoot an arrow that killed Balder and the world went dark. Also there have come some stuff in Christianity as well as where the story of The Last Supper and the Crucifixion as there were 13 individuals who were present in the Upper Room the night before Jesus' death. However, there are some cultures like G

 One of the biggest challenges I have faced throughout my entire life when it comes to mental health is the constant thoughts of always upsetting people and being nothing more than a failure to them no matter how hard you try not to be. These last few days haven't been the best of times to say the least. I get so freaking frustrated when I plan on doing something for someone but stuff happens and I am not happy about because I know it bothers the other person. And yet it happens. I tell myself all the time that I shouldn't be so hard on myself when stuff like this happens. I don't purposely do stuff to upset anybody. I honestly don't want anyone to hate me but when something doesn't go according to plan and things change or doesn't happen, I just get furious with myself. Just the other week I planned on helping a friend and unfortunately I had to tell him at the last minute that I couldn't do it. I felt like crap having to tell him that and I've been kin

 I am singing in the rain. Its very touch has made me forget of all of the pain. I am so thankful for the days where I don't go insane. God, I wish these feelings would never end. But ultimately it always ends with me alone and without a friend. Laying on the ground letting the rain wash all my worries away. It is reminder that despite the tough times, the sun will come out to reveal a brand new day. Just something about the sound of rain splashing against my windows as I sleep keeps me calm. It feels even better as I'm reading the psalms. The beauty of the rain drops kind of brings me back in time when things around me seem so simple and carefree. Because I feel at times that all of the joy has been sucked out of me. Seeing the rain fall brings me into another world that isn't so cold. I feel I can be strong, courageous and bold. As the rain continues to fall around me, I will always seek to have my happiness increase. For I pray that I will soon found that inner peace.

 As we prepare to do our daily battles with the dark and misery. We remind ourselves to stay humble and do things through love and chivalry. Through the power of prayer we wear our colors proudly for we wear black and blue. It is to remind us of the pain we face will soon past for God's love for me and you is forever true. We mix the white with the black to represents God's protection both day and night. Whether it is with rays of sunshine or by the beautiful moonlight. The colors blue and white symbolizes our search for truth and to continue to fight for what is right. To guide and protect those who seek to find God's Light. With our swords and shields we fight those who were sent to destroy us. But we still pray for their souls in the name of Jesus. For we know that we too are flawed and full of sin. But together we can all find the light from within. Because we all want peace in our lives and pray for hope. Just for us to know that God will always be there for us and giv