So Many Questions, So Little Time!

    Do we really learn from the past? Do we as people will ever truly understand what is happening around us each and every day?

For my entire life, I have search, questioned and prayed to help me understand what, why and how when it comes to this crazy world we live in. I often wonder if I am even doing anything worth while.

I can't even watch or read anything in the news anymore because I honestly feel like all it does is cause hatred. Like is anything even being accomplished? I see people arguing and saying incredibly terrible things to each other over something and honestly I'm not even sure they are talking about the same thing half time.

Do you really know what we are talking about? Or is it has the bible says, the blind leading the blind? Heck, even if somebody was right about something, they are still wrong because they think that gives them the excuse to just ruin people's lives.

There are so many questions, I wish I could find an answer to. But I don't even know if it is possible to find one of those answers in my life.

Of course as I have mentioned before in previous blogs, I deal with CP and Scoliosis due to birth defects and I question why that happened? What was the purpose for that? 

However there are even more personal questions I think about every single day. Like have a made a difference in someone else's life. Could someone like myself even make a difference in someone's life? 

I look at parents everyday and worry about how they think of me and am I a failure in their eyes? Could I have done more? Is there any hope of accomplishing that?

Recently I became an uncle and I remember it like it was yesterday. Walking into the hospital and seeing Lukey for the time, getting to hold him was such a blessing. However, I started wondering if I could be a good influence on him. Just looking into his eyes I fear that I am not good enough and scared I won't be able to protect him.

This has also affected my writing in a lot of ways as well. I often wonder if I am doing good or should I be even writing the stuff I like.

I sadly admit I have had moments where I question if I actually know anything about myself. Like is this me? Is this what I really like? I enjoy it so must be good right?

Maybe I am being a bit out there, maybe I am overthinking things. I can't even imagine what others who are going through the same thing. So people out there in the world, not sure of anything.

I pray for us all to find that happiness and inner peace. Whether we realize it or not, we are all in this together.

God Bless and Be Safe!