How do you love and forgive yourself?

 A common phrase that we all have heard is that how can we love somebody else if we can't love ourselves? However, I have a question, how does one do that?

I only ask because I really do not know how to love myself. I've been dealing with depression for so long that I am not even sure of what kind of a world I live in. To be honest, I really didn't understand the world when I was younger, but as I grow older, I have been kind of scared of what not knowing what to do especially with all of the changes in the world nowadays.

Of course I didn't really help myself with all the years of self-abuse either. I never really thought I was ever good enough for anybody and never would be no matter hard much I tried. So how can one let go of so much pain and misery.

Don't get me wrong, I do admit that I have been in a much better head space than I really ever had in my life, Thank You God! I guess this is just a concern of mine as I continue to face things head on. But I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't scared about the future because my biggest fear is falling backwards.

For starters, one of the issues is that I have things about myself that I have always wondered and wanted to explore but not really sure how to go about it. To be honest, I am scared to even talk with other people about things.

To be perfectly honest with everyone, I am really confused right now. Again, not trying to concern anybody, just trying to make sense of everything.

A lot of this has affected my writing some days as well. You see, I would love to be able to publish a novel someday. But I keep getting in my own way because of my fear being looked at weird or give out the wrong impression to others. Cause Lord knows I can be social awkward.

So how can I truly learn to not only be myself, but to actually love myself? And what is also very important to me is that I don't want to forget about other people because I am not only with struggles with everyday life and I don't want to cause any issues. That is not my intention, I just simply want to know that I can make it in this world.

Having God in my life is extremely important to me as well. With that being said, I can't lie and hide how I feel about things and what I like to write about. But I also like to write about the importance of having faith and that there is always hope. Can I really blend all of that together?

I just pray for guidance and more importantly strength because I really want to figure things out in my life. Because I honestly believe that I can use it to turn things around not only in my life, others as well. I truly believe that is what God would want us to do is to inspire each other and lift each other up and grow.

Sorry if I am being weird, I am just trying to figure myself out because I honestly not sure what to love about myself. Just wish I could just open up on things better!

I also pray for others who are going through a similar situation as well because let's be honest with ourselves. We all want to be happy in our lives.

Praying for all of us! God Bless and Be Safe everyone!